Books, Tears and Pete the Cat

I cried in Barnes and Noble the other night.

I stood there in the children’s section surrounded by Pete’s New Shoes, crayons revolting (The Day the Crayons Quit– a terribly clever book. Check it out!) and about a bazillion Berenstain Bears books and cried.

Now, I don’t normally cry in retail stores, but that night was different. I was holding in my hands yet another example of God’s incredible goodness to me.

It started months and months ago in an off-hand comment made by a four-year-old playing with a worm. His words echoed in my head, took shape in the shower, and turned into a book.

I spent almost as much time playing with every word, every syllable, of that book as I did praying that God would use it for His glory. Sell this book, I told God, and use it to bring you praise. Sell this book, and show people how amazing you are. Sell this book.

I sat on a balcony in Florida, overlooking the Atlantic before me, and paid my way to a writer’s conference that I begged God would not be a mistake. So much money. So many people there pitching books to so few editors. So much potential for rejection.

Just sell this book.

But He didn’t.

No one there wanted the book, nor have they wanted it since. It has died a slow and sad death at the hands of numerous Christian books publishers who don’t care about worms. (Or perhaps it’s just in a coma and will someday awake, but the jury’s still out on that…)

However, I met someone at the conference. It wasn’t as romantic as it sounds.

She, an editor. Me, an untested writer with a book she didn’t want. She killing time asked if I would be interested in work-for-hire. Me not sure what work-for-hire was.

So…sure! Why not?

Tonight, I held the result of that meeting in my hands.

God did not answer as I had asked. He did not sell this book. He took my sorry attempts at bringing Him glory and turned it all around on me. He gave me a book that I didn’t expect in a way I couldn’t have thought up through a meeting I didn’t plan.

It’s just like Him, really.

He is too good to me. He knows my tendency to steal all the credit. He sees my weakness to seek validation from other people. He knew that selling that book wasn’t what I needed. I needed a book that He is the only explanation for.

So He gave me God Bless You and Good Night.

I can’t take credit. I couldn’t brag if I wanted to. I really can’t say much of anything.


God is so good. Says the girl who cries at the back of Barnes and Noble.

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  1. sally apokedak said:

    What a wonderful story!

    I’m so happy to know you, and I can’t wait to see where God takes you on this publishing road. He’s given you such a talent. I’m eager to see what all he does with it!


    1. admin Post author said:

      We are in this together, Sally! I can’t wait to see what He has in mind for both of us! Thanks for your un-wavering support. I need it!!!


  2. Niki said:

    You’re a treasure and true inspiration. Thank you for your testimony and your wonderful openness to what God has planned. You are a truly amazing person and such an example of what we are supposed to be. Thank you for sharing and thank you for your inspiration. I’m so excited to see what’s next for you!


    1. admin Post author said:

      Thanks, Nik. I miss you!!!


  3. Rebecca Barlow Jordan said:

    Great job telling about your fun journey. God is so faithful, isn’t He? I have no doubt. God is getting the glory for your writing! So fun to meet you in Dallas! Love your book!


    1. admin Post author said:

      Thanks, Rebecca. But even more than the book, I’ve been blessed through the people I met at ACFW. Such a pleasure to know you now!


  4. T Denise Clary said:

    I am so fortunate to have met you at the conference. God is so good! He knew that I did not know anyone and felt very out of place. You have truly been an inspiration and it is so exciting to hear how God is working in your life! I know that there is so much more to come and I can’t wait to be at the forefront and hear all about it!


    1. admin Post author said:

      Thank you, Tonya! I was praying for a friend there too. We needed each other! Still do. 😉


  5. Susie Hudson said:

    Love you and love your book! Most of all, I love your heart for God!!


    1. admin Post author said:

      Thank you, Susie! Love you too!


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